From Me to You

Expressing your emotions is, in my opinion, one of the most important things about being a human. It enables you to feel confident, strong, and able, no matter what emotions it is you are expressing. Even if you are expressign emotions that someone may consider sad, the fact that you are still able to speak how YOU feel is what may make you feel strong. When you are no longer able to express how you feel, your identity and worth feel stolen from you. When I can not express my emotions, it makes me feel worse, it makes me feel as though there is no point at all. Why can't I just express how I feel? I don't want to hurt someone elses feelings. But what about my own feelings? Sometimes I do not want to express my emotions because I feel as though it it an "at-the-moment" feelings, and I may find myself wishing I wouldn't have said that. Me and you, we should always express how you feel. Ive had a boyfriend for a pretty long time, at least a long time for my age and in my own opinion, and I find myself wanting to be single. I find myself becoming bored and find myself thinking about other guys more than my own boyfriend. Then there are times when I don't want anyone but him, and no other guy can make me happy. There are days when I am at a median and feel simply complacent with where I am at. I am in college and have had a boyfriend basically since I arrived in college. Sometimes I want to explore my options, other time I want only to lay with him in bed and watch movies, other times at parties I want to dance with other people and not feel so guilty about it. I feel as though I am married. I am young and married and stuck where I am at. If we were to break up though I feel as though my heart would rip straight out of my chest. I am scared of how I will feel when and if we break up. Emotions are not physical things, but emotions can still kill you if you allow them to swallow your mind and heart. Feeling scared of your own emotions, to me, is worse than not being able to express your emotions at all. I'd rather not be able to say what is on my mind, then be worried and scared about how I am going to feel about something, especially something that hasn't even happened. I want to be free from feeling sadness. I want to live my life and not worry about my emotions. Why is it that we can not have our cake and eat it too, emotions and life would be so much easier.